Exploring Misplays & A New Approach
One of the biggest reasons for my progression over the past three years is the fact that win or lose, I always take full ownership of my performance and the results. At times it hurts, specifically when coming off of a poor or disappointing performance. Even when variance just seems to go against me, I acknowledge that there’s always at least one thing I could have done differently - before or during my matches - to ensure a more favorable result.
For me, improvement has felt like a refining process. Identify a deck - preferably the best deck - and learn it. Play it a lot, identify heuristics, master the matchups, master sideboarding, make mistakes, correct the mistakes through practice, adjust heuristics as needed, adjust the 75 to stay ahead of the meta, see what other players are doing differently, and try to understand why. Wash, rinse, repeat.
But even then, no matter how much you practice and prepare, or how well you do on the ladder, you can go into a tournament and get 1 win all day. And when it’s over, you still have to ask yourself, “what could I have done differently?”
That’s what happened to me at the 5K Kaldheim Qualifier this past weekend. For the second Sunday in a row I had an undesirable outcome. Two weekends ago I went 2-3 (Rd 1 bye), and this weekend I went 1-3 (Rd 1 bye again), winning only one actual game of Magic.
It’s hard to pinpoint what went wrong in those events, but there are a couple memorable things that went wrong for me at the 5K Qualifier this past weekend.
Round 2, Game 1: Gruul Mirror
In my very first game my opening hand had 2 Scavenging Ooze, a Brushfire Elemental, one Embercleave, one Forest, one Cragcrown Pathway and one Fabled Passage. The Fabled Passage becomes another Forest so that I can pump up the Ooze. Fast forward through the game, and I have my opponent at 6 and an empty board. They’re picking off my creatures one by one to stay alive, and a Brushfire Elemental and 3/3 Ooze remain on my side - but still no second red source. Two key opportunities to close out the game pass before a Shatterskull Smashing wipes my board and my chances to win. I untap, draw a red mana source, and proceed to lose the game and the match.
Looking back at the beginning of the game when I cracked the Fabled Passage, I decided it was more important to have green mana to protect the Ooze - even though I was on the play, even though I had both Ooze in hand, and even though there are more green sources in the deck than red. Had I fetched a Mountain with the Fabled Passage, do I go onto win that game, and potentially the match (considering my 70% win rate in the Gruul mirror)?
The Error: Prioritization. I needed to prioritize being able to cast that Cleave, even if it wouldn’t be happening until later in the game.
Round 4, Game 3: Sultai Control
UBx Control is a good matchup, and this one was no different. Going into G3 I actually brought a third Embercleave back in, and saw two in my opening hand. I can’t remember the rest of the hand exactly, but I believe it was 3 creatures and two lands. It was a fast and functional opener that was ideal against UBx Control, but unfortunately I drew the third Embercleave, my opponent went one-for-one with spot removal, including a turn in which he killed my Vivien and a 3/3 in the same turn. I ultimately ran out of gas and lost. Had I shipped that hand back, would I have won that match and stayed alive for the day?
Error: Possibly a poor keep, but hard to say. A hand with multiple Cleave isn’t great, but against any deck running Elspeth’s Nightmare, it’s not a bad idea to keep a hand with two Cleave. In a must-win though, it’s probably best to mull.
And these are just the in-game microdecisions that I’m Monday morning-quarterbacking in order to figure out what has been going wrong. I could have made mistakes in the construction of my 75, though I registered a deck I went 5-1 with the previous day in Satellite #6 (3-1 in the mirror). I could have tested more on the ladder after the Satellite on Saturday, but I had been playing for about 7 hours, which feels reasonable. There are any number of factors that determine whether or not you win or lose, and you can only control so many of them. But as important as preparation and solid gameplay are, how you respond to an undesirable tournament can actually impact your performance in the next one.
Move Along…and Think
Considering my day ended pretty early on Sunday, I had a lot of time left on my hands. I did a not-so-quick bodyweight workout, and then went out for a run. In my frustration though, I set a new PR, running 7.2 miles in just under an hour.
One of the things I like most about running is having time to think. Of course, I thought a lot about Magic on that run. I thought about how much I can’t stand losing, I thought about how I should find a dedicated playtest group, and I thought about all of the microdecisions I made that day, and what would have happened had I navigated those decisions differently. I thought about how tired I was with being frustrated with this game, and right around mile 6 I had a breakthrough.
I realized that I forgot something very important about myself: I’m human.
At times competitive Magic can feel very much like chasing a carrot. I can’t tell if I’m five feet away or five years away, but what I know right now is that in four years of playing at this level, still have yet to have any success on Day 2 of an event. In 2 years of playing Arena, I still have yet to reach Day 2 of an MIQ. I’m sure every established player has been there though, and I know that my lack of tournament achievements is not reflective of my actual skill or my potential. And really, it’s knowing that which can make disappointment hurt. Otherwise, it’s really just an issue of patience.
When you focus on your tournament results, it’s easy to lose sight of the progress. Additionally, for someone like me who has a “keep pushing” work ethic, the frustration that comes with a lack of desired results doesn’t get easier to manage. And so, I keep pushing. I keep refining my process, over and over and over again, until hopefully, one Sunday I make the right microdecisions under the right cosmic alignment, the carrot slips through the string, and the name Jeff Sheerin is found on the Top 8 of a major event, or found among the players qualified for an MC.
But until then, I’m ok with being human and giving my best effort to prepare for that day when opportunity comes calling. Persistent as I am, I’ll continue doing whatever it takes to put myself within earshot.
My New Approach: Win the Week
As I type this, another Arena MIQ takes place tomorrow, which I’m definitely looking forward to. But this time around I tried to prepare a bit differently, which is definitely going to continue to be my approach going forward. Yeah, I still went through the typical tournament preparation process: playtesting on the ladder, playtesting with friends, watching videos, reading articles, researching decklists, and so on. But instead of simply looking to have success at the Qualifier, my goal was to win the entire week - in all aspects of my life.
I wanted to have a strong week at work, a great week of fitness, feel connected with my wife and achieve many other things that I knew would keep me feeling balanced, strong and satisfied in knowing that I gave the world my best effort. I did just that.
But going back to Magic, I wanted to be sure that I was finding satisfaction in the process of actually preparing for the event. I made a conscious effort to find satisfaction in playing tough opponents in high Mythic, and find satisfaction in knowing that I was showing up every day and putting in the work to improve my skills throughout the week. I know that if I can find satisfaction and enjoyment in those things, then my results this weekend will be secondary.
Win the week, and what happens on Saturday and Sunday is a blip on the radar - win or lose.
